Onward.

Time marches on, taking us all with it. Little changing, little happening, different day same ol' same ol'.
I'm seizing the moment to set to typing. Wendy's sister has just 'phoned for a rant, so I have half an hour (at least) to spare.
I don't know, I seem to be stuck in a rut at the moment, trapped in a job I don't like, knowing they are screwing me over, with no prospect of getting my driving out of it. The driving jobs outside of work are either catch 22 or really temporary. Not really an option.
Then there's the possibility of the army. Not ideal, and an option strongly opposed by Wendy and my family, but if needs must one that is a workable solution.
The bloody sax is a pain as well. Whilst I am learning I can't seem to get a sense of satisfaction, of a job well done. I'm at best approaching a level that shows some understanding of where it should be going, then it's on to the next chapters. It really is two or three chapters per lesson. I sit down and he says this next chapter (which I haven't even looked at whilst trying to get to grips with the previous two or three he set me) is a good one to warm up on! What! Then there are all the horrible things like timing, flats and sharps. I'm so focused just on trying to read the next note and make my fingers press the relevant keys I don't have the mental capacity to simultaneously beat out 6/8 time or remember that the next note had a flat sign at the beginning of the bar so you press different buttons.
When all's said and done, this is just learning. I am hoping that one day (the sooner the better) I will be able to read the music as fluently and naturally as I read a book, thus freeing myself up to think about all the other stuff I should be doing. No sign of that happening any time soon.

On the bright side it's nearly new year. A fresh start. Get back into the Kung Fu, keep looking for a driving job, keep plugging away at the sax. Probably just the time of year cheesing me off. Cold, dark, all the extra stress of the damned holiday period, the seasonal illness etc.

I feel like I've written all this before, that nothing has changed, is changing or will change.

Just got to soldier on. What are your options?

Next year it will all change. By the end you won't know the ennui-ed me you see before you.

Later,
Buck.